Hello there, lovely cat-adoring humans. It’s Feegle again!
This blog post looks at why you love kitty cats so much.
It should go without saying really but I like to make myself heard and to share cute photos of me. I’m a cat. I must always be noticed.
20 Reasons Why Humans Love Cats
- We have fluff. Humans don’t. Well, there are some fluffy humans but I’ve heard very hairy people are usually a bit icky.
2. You like stroking our fluff. We pretend to like it to make you happy. The things we do for you.
3. We have the best gaze for getting us out of scrapes. We may shred your sofa but you’ll soon simmer down when we give you the look. Our eyes are mesmerising. Many a human has been slain by them. Cats’ eyes will take over the world one day, one gooey human at a time.
4. We purr. You can’t purr. You’re jealous of our purr. The closest you’ll get is picking up a telephone and hearing the dialling tone. You don’t want to coo over the telephone, though do you?
5. We are great lap-warmers. When it’s chilly, we help you to get warm. When it’s hot, it’s your tough luck. The human lap was actually created to be a cat seat. It’s a fact.
6. We are freaking nuts. We’ll suddenly bolt around the house like our bum is on fire. We stare at things that aren’t there for hours. We lick walls (just me?) We’ll chase any little thing you throw. We are the weirdness inside you that you wish you could set free. You admire that we can be off our heads and get away with it.
7. We make great cat memes and videos. We break the internet regularly and take up your time looking at us on the t’interwebs. You are mesmerised by us.
8. You think we look cute when you dress us up. We think your face and arms need to be gouged for even trying. Stick an outfit on a dumb mutt. Leave the cat alone. We’re already beautiful enough.
9. You can never figure out what mood we’re going to be in. Being around a cat is endless entertainment. One moment we’re curling up beside you, the next we’re slashing your arms for having the cheek to stroke us. Life is never boring around a mood-changing cat.
10. We can position ourselves how we like. As a girl, I never have to worry about shutting my legs and not showing the world what I had for breakfast. Lady humans have to be careful with this. Boy cats also get to let their bits swing free. Man humans should never do this.
11. We will sleep on top of you and make you feel wanted. What we’re actually doing is using you as practise for killing our prey and subduing it. Carry on thinking it’s sweet if you like.
12. We sleep a lot. This causes you minimal effort. Until we wake you up at 3am when you’re sleeping but you’ll get over it.
13. We don’t need walking like those idiot dogs. We’re far too cool and independent to be put on a lead and told where to go.
14. We show how much we love you via the occasional head butt or body slam. You are powerless when we make the contact with you. The touch of a cat is your kryptonite.
15. We have pinky paws. You have pinky hands. Our paws are better because they look like jelly beans, have fur around them, and claws ready to strike at any moment.
16. You admire our independence. You wish you could be more like us in your everyday life. Imagine if you could walk away from your boring boss. How great would it be to yawn in the face of a boring friend? How about sticking your bum in the face of a relative who turned up unannounced?
17. We are cheeky and you love it. No-one else in your life gets away with being demanded to be fed and then ignoring the food you give them. No-one else gets your full attention and then forgiveness for snapping back at you. No-one else is allowed to shred your body, curtains, cushions, sofa, and basically anything without being cast out of your life.
18. We bring you presents: prizes from our hunts left in lovely places, souvenirs in the litter tray, and vomit by the side of the bed for you to stand in. We are the gifts that keep on giving.
19. We can make a bad day better just by snuggling up to you and allowing you to snot cry into our fur. Cats are the best companions for bad days when you don’t want to talk but need to feel the love.
20. We’re less maintenance than a child. You basically chuck food at us, keep us in treats, provide us a place to do our business, and leave the rest to us. You don’t need to change our nappy, although I hear cleaning a litter tray isn’t so much of a treat. You don’t need to clothe us. We’ll play unsupervised. We may demand attention at intervals though.
21. You basically want to be us. You know you can’t so you adore us instead. We’re doing you a favour. Don’t you forget it.
Over to You
Why do you love cats?
What do you love about your own feline friend?
Haters of cats need not comment. You’re not real. My mum told me you are the monsters under the bed.